An old Irish tradition has returned

There is a return to different generations living together in one house if we are to believe recent press reports. There is nothing new about this. Years ago, people of different ages and generations lived together in one house or thatched cottage; indeed in places where there were only two to three rooms.

It was not unusual in the Ireland of the mid-20th century to have three generations living under one roof - in fact, that practice continued until the late 20th century. The man or woman who got the house would be expected to look after the old couple as part of the agreement or contract. The woman coming into the house would be expected to have a fortune or dowry, or Spré in Irish, and all would settle down together to raise the children of the union. By and large, this arrangement went on from generation to generation.

The naming system of families derived from this practice, especially where there were several families with the same surname. There was Nellie Michael Sheain and there was Annie Tony and also Nellie Johnny Sheamais and Owen Tailor Loftus. This was because there were lots of Loftus families in the area and the people and the postman had to be able to distinguish between them. The people had lived for centuries in houses like this. By understanding this naming system, the young people would know their grandparents’ names and be able to appreciate family history better.

Not all arrangements were as simple and straightforward as this. On occasions, the couple might agree to look after their parents when they married but once they were wed they would go back on the agreement. Several cases ended up in court and there was a good deal of acrimony and bitterness afterwards. In one case, the old couple had to seek refuge in a neighbour’s house until the court case came up and the younger couple was compelled to take them back.

Yet this was more the exception than the rule and children had the fondest memories of being raised with their grandparents who looked after them whilst their parents worked in the fields and on the bog. My grandmother and her sisters always spoke fondly of their grandparents and how nice they were to them.

Indeed, there were cases where a child would be fostered out to live with an aunt or uncle and subsequently go on to inherit the farm and house and then marry and agree to look after the old aunt or uncle and they were none the worse for it! God be good to them all.

This writer was raised in a house with a number of different generations. There was my great-grandfather, his son and daughter and my two second cousins and we all got on very well even though we were far from the nuclear family that was the norm at the time i.e. in the 1970s when the practice of the grandparents living with the younger couple was on the wane. But when this scribe looks back on it there were a good deal of households where the older people lived in the same house as the younger people. This practice died out in the 1980s but it is interesting to see that it is making a comeback due to economic circumstances as the rising cost of rents has forced many young couples to live with their parents until they are able to afford the deposit for a home.

It is ironic that this old and time-honoured tradition that was widely practiced in Ireland years ago is back again.